Bang that Black ♥♥♥♥♥ vol 8 is without a doubt, a vessel for Jesus to teach us more lessons. A gift, nay, a PRIVILEGE of being human; this game has changed my life. It tosses the Seven Wonders of the World aside shamefully. I was blind, a fool, before the guiding light of this game embraced me in its fuzzy grasp. I would call it a sequel to the Bible, but even that pales in comparison to this wonder. Pleasantries aside, Hello Games has created what can only be described as a true masterpiece. An undiscovered relic of its time, they deserve every penny this game earns and more.


The Gameplay: Intuitive, yet simple. Intriguing and engaging, yet easy to pick up and understand. You don't play, you EXPERIENCE this. I didn't play as Shaniqua, I WAS Shaniqua. Immersion is an understatement to the nth degree. The extremely tight and polished control scheme only exacerbated this feeling, so intricately designed that I didn't even noticed how expertly the tutorial was entwined with the gameplay. I didn't need a tutorial; it was almost as if this game was an extension of my body, I instinctively knew what to press. (That being said, I did indeed venture back to the tutorial after a couple of games as I was compelled to experience every inch of this divine gift).

The Characters: I cannot begin to describe how beautifully crafted these individuals are. Shaniqua, Porky, and of course the Ravishing Tyrone himself, are all so accurately portrayed in this adaptation that I felt as though I were in the mind of Tyrone himself. Every aspect from their design, to the dry wit of Tyrone, to the taught, toned body of Shaniqua were so expertly designed that I felt truly in the scene. I can't even begin to imagine how many hours of motion capture were needed to accurately replicate the natural movements of the real world.


The Plot: I refuse to reveal much here, as this is best experienced firsthand. Expect many plot twists, extremely interesting sub plots and deception galore. I can't begin to imagine a more complex and iterative story than what has been provided here. Keep tissues close by for this one!

The Social Commentary: Now a fair warning here, the game is not scared to delve into more controversial issues. Again I feel it's best to experience this first hand, both for shock factor and to not reveal any of the numerous major plot points. I wouldn’t be surprised if society as a whole is rewritten in the mold of this gem. Go in with an open mind and there shouldn't be too many problems here. Truly, a title for the intellectuals out there.

The only downside (if you can call it one) is that all other games pale in comparison to this masterpiece. No matter what game I play, I never get very far, as the best of them are mere puddles compared to the ocean that is Bang that Black ♥♥♥♥♥ vol 8. It is, by definition, our Magnum Opus, our crown jewel. I will live out the rest of my days knowing that there is nothing more for me on this earth. This game is mankind's single greatest achievement. All of human history has been leading up to this moment. Without a doubt, it is the pinnacle of thousands of years of human evolution. I can’t imagine what life was life before this game. Others can say they were alive to explore the world or the stars for the first time. We lucky few can say we were alive to explore Bang that Black ♥♥♥♥♥ vol 8.

All in all I would recommend this game to everyone and anyone. It has managed to transcend genre, and even the title of "game" itself. I feel that it doesn't even begin to cover the ART that is this game. I have never felt more human than when I booted up this classic. I am proud to nominate this game for the Game of the Year Steam award and I highly urge you to do the same. A true thought consumer and tear jerker, I'm shocked it isn't on sale for 100X its price.

That’s all folks!