I want you to reread what you wrote here, and then ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ go to the nearest set of stairs and just ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ fling yourself as hard as you can into the wall about 6 feet from the top steps. If by some ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ miracle you are still able to move around/think clearly I want you to just start shrieking at the top of your lungs until someone calls 911 and the police arrive. When they start questioning you I want you to growl like the deranged ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ animal you are, and lunge for the closest police officers gun. Then, and only ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ then, will you have a shot at redemption. May god have ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ mercy on your soul... because I sure as ♥♥♥♥ wont.