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23 of 29 (79%) achievements earned:
Personal Achievements
 

NotEvenRemotelyFair.WAD

Die within 5 seconds of starting a game on Selaco Must Fall difficulty
Unlocked 15 Aug @ 11:31am

Marathon Runner

Take 15,000 steps in a single Campaign save
Unlocked 4 Jun @ 1:48pm

Reporting for duty!

Suit up
Unlocked 31 May @ 6:15pm

Safe Heaven

Unlock your first Safe Room
Unlocked 1 Jun @ 1:19pm

Pub Brawl

Start an argument at The Broken Seal
Unlocked 4 Jun @ 2:23pm

Power Overwhelming

Obtain the Railgun Prototype from Starlight
Unlocked 23 Jun @ 5:24pm

Daily Bonus

Claim a free daily drink at the Mall
Unlocked 4 Jun @ 7:27pm

AFK

Spend 1 hour inside a 'Xen Wellness Center' sauna without interruption
Unlocked 9 Jun @ 9:24pm

Myth, busted!

Cause a toilet to explode without using explosives
Unlocked 9 Jun @ 7:38pm

Humiliation!

Defeat a Juggernaut with your fists
Unlocked 15 Aug @ 11:52am

Death Incarnate

Kill 1,000 Enemies
Unlocked 8 Jun @ 4:28pm

Buddy System

Buddy-up with Jonathan
Unlocked 8 Jun @ 4:57pm

Sharp and Shiny

Obtain all upgrades for a single weapon
Unlocked 23 Jun @ 1:41pm

Sharp Shooter

Land a Headshot Kill from at least 70 meters away
Unlocked 10 Jun @ 1:20pm

Gwyn Simp

Spend at least 5000 Selver in a single Gwyn Machine session
Unlocked 23 Jun @ 11:56am

Unionize!

Get 100 Minimum-Wagers in Burger Flipper
Unlocked 13 Aug @ 6:21pm

Humanity's Second Chance

Reach the streets
Unlocked 4 Jun @ 3:13pm

Homecoming

Visit Dawn's home
Unlocked 4 Jun @ 4:07pm

Death Toll

Prevent a mutation from happening, by any means necessary
Unlocked 8 Jun @ 5:58pm

Paper Forever

Fight through the Liancria Office Complex
Unlocked 4 Jun @ 7:09pm

Game Over!

Complete Chapter 1
Unlocked 10 Jun @ 1:43pm

DPS LFG

Obtain 1200 DPS at the Shooting Range in Punching Bag mode
Unlocked 15 Aug @ 12:01pm

Overkill

Kill an enemy with your Fists while having a Bunny Hopper, Protein Shake and Confidence Booster active
Unlocked 23 Jun @ 1:23pm



Little Plushy Man

Safely return Wilson the Bear to Dawn's home

Crime Averted

Save a fish from suffocation

Save the World, bro!

Reach Level 10 in SPACE BRO

It's not a bug, it's a feature!

Trigger a Trash Tornado

Mozzarella Miracle!

Get very lucky by finding a full box of pizza

Embrace The Chaos

Complete Chapter 1 in Special Campaign