600+ Hours in warframe

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⢀⣿⠀⢀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⢴⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣆
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Welcome back!

Happy birthday. I understand if I'm not a welcome person to say that, but I thought it would mean something if it was coming from an old friend. I know I'm late to it, but i still hope it was a great birthday.

I've watched the new Super Mario Bros movie and I'm utterly disappointed on how they nerfed Mario's Italian ass.

I mean, come on Nintendo. The guy is casually jumping over three times his height, which is more than double the world record. With this kind of performance, it would make sense for him to have a tonic, juicy back. But no, he's flatter than my hope in humanity.

Moreover, he's Italian. Have you ever seen an Italian ass? That premium quality dump? Right now, Mario might be the only flat-assed Italian in existence, I swear.

In the past, I have dreamt multiple times about the Mario movie. I've fantasized about his balloonish glutei maximi suffocating Bowser to death. Only to flee the self-destruction of the castle by bouncing on that soft but massive arse.

But no, Nintendo had to make it SJW friendly. "Not every Italian has a dump truck ass", they said. "He's representing the normality of plumbers' asses".

+rep played with him years ago but have the best memories