CATERPILLAR POWER

BATTLE BUGS, TODAY REALITY IS AT OUR DOOR. WE KNOW OUR FATE AND WE WILL OVERCOME IT. WE PLAY FOR OUR PLEASURE AS ULTRA DWEEBS, AS NECKBEARDS, AND WE PLAY IN THE NAME OF FAILURE!

Let this be the time change fellow Battle Bugs, let this be the time where we show the world we are not solitary moths in the night. We should have numerous meetings, allowing for multiple, simultaneous and devastating defensive deep strikes against our fruitless psyche.

The codex activites names this maneuver Maturus Extremus. We will descend upon our lazy selves, we will overwhelm them - we will leave none wanting.

We are the Battle Bugs. We are the masters of our destinies.

As the captain of this noble clan, I declare video games ordo hereticus. Instead of sitting staring at a series of blinking lights, we should find more honourable activities that call for intelligence, cunning and wit. We had a taste of such brilliance with our ventures into the classic DnD but it seemed not enough to change our future as forever isolated deadbeats.

This is not a reason to give up fellow Battle Bugs, we shall overcome. Upon the horizon of entertainment lies many untouched relics of great satisfaction. One day, we may find one of these treasures and forever seal away our image, and prosper as social intellectual beings of honour.

Fellow Battle Bugs, I beseech you that you find the inner courage to stand up against your sad fortune and find a true hobby that we can all gather around to appreciate. That we can all do something better with our gifts. So that we can not waste them in such a disgusting manner. After all, WE ARE BATTLE BUGS.