Welcome back, again! Its the fat guy turn. It should be a small guide since taking out the secondary section he doesnt seem to have the gigantus numbers of weapons that other classes have (poor him). And also, so sorry for the delay of 3/4 weeks. I need vacations just like you do. So, lets start!!!!

Huo Long Heater

Overall score: 3.3/10

The Crazed Buttstaber: 6/10- ''People fail to see this weapon use. Its not to damage and expose spies. Only the new ones fall for that. Its to damage close quarters classes. Scout will have to be jumping to kill you and if he survives he will have to look for a medkit fast, since the minigun does so much damage. Other classes like pyro and demoknights, while maybe invunerable to fire, will have to be taking extra damage if they want to kill you.''

Dave: 5/10- "Ammo Drain City, ♥♥♥♥♥."

logitin: 1/10- "no. just no."

FGTH 2/10- ''I wish they would create ammo sandvich''

Agent Walther: 3,5/10 - Some chinese thingy that scares noob spies and annoys demoknights. But it eats the ammo too fast, so it's too bad for any long fight, maybe with the exeption of defending the cart.

Dr. Moron: 3/10- ''When Heavy said "I want another way to kill cowards" I MEANT BY BULLETS!''

Lord Gaben's Pillow of Death: 7/10- ''to me the stock is always the best''

I main Hunstman: 7/10- ''I think, a straight upgrade on payload maps, and I think the fire-ring is more useful than people think''

Jonh the Enginner: 0/10- ''The Huo Long Heater more like "Poot dispenser here.". ''

Landeyx: 0/10- "No,Just No"

Cpt. Haxray: 2/10- ''A minigun made for defense, but giving barely any thing worthwhile in terms of that. The ammo chew rate will screw you over faster than a solider with uber, crits, and speedhacks.''

Brass Beast

Overall Score: 6,2/10

The Crazed Buttstaber: 7/10: ''Just like the Natasha, it got a huge buff. I just think the effect had a bigger impact on the Natasha''

Dave: 4/10 "The go-to Weapon for Rage Heavies. Slow as f***, and probably can't aim for ♥♥♥♥♥."

logitin: 9/10 "you maybe slow but it's broken"

FGTH 6/10- ''idk''

Agent Walther: 6/10 - ''Has it's uses, makes you more tanky, but... You're a sentry with no engineer refilling you, so you're easy target for demos, soldiers and... Spies.''

Dr. Moron: 7/10- ''This weapon is good to help tiny Engineer,teamwork is key!''

Laneyx: 4/10- ''2slow4me''

Cpt. Haxray: 7/10- ''While i still think the brass is inferior to the natasha most of the time, it has its niche uses, mostly for surprising the other team by changing to it when they least expect it.''

Natasha

Overall score: 6.9/10

The Crazed Buttstaber: 8/10- ''It got a HUGE buff.''

Agent Walther: 6.5/10 - ''No more +50% ammo and weaker slowing effect. Still pretty good, just not as awesome.''

FGTH 8/10- ''gg''

LOGITIN:6/10- "if i only had this now"

Dr. Moron: 8/10- ''I firstly denied Natascha but now it is going to be used after that glorious buff.''

Landeyx: 4/10- Sascha can be usefull.

Cpt. Haxray: 8/10- ''While not as good as the stock or tomlislav on offense, it shines when it comes to defense. While still usable on offense, the others are generally better since the slow effect doesnt do as much.''

Tomislav

Overall score: 7,8/10

The Crazed Buttstaber:4/10- ''Heavy is about damage. This is against such idea. It deserves the 4.''

Dave:7/10- "Screw Spy, we got Heavy. "

logitin:5/10- "i cant stop being dead when i use it but is still good."

Agent Walther: 10/10 - ''A real killing machine when used correctly. Ambush enemies, play agressive, be a roaming heavy - because nobody expects silent roaming heavy jumping from the corner''

Dr. Moron: 9/10- ''Heavy is Spy and Sniper!''

Landeyx: 10/10- Why not?

Sir. ButterShoes: 10/10- ''I have a minigun, or a minigun which is part-sniper rifle. Choice is obvious.''

Cpt. Haxray: 8/10- ''Despite the reduced fire-rate, you simply are way more mobile with this weapon. You're quieter, spin up faster, and have better accuracy than with the normal chaingun, allowing you to engage targets at longer range. Theres a reason this weapon is heavy's love child in competitve.''

Minigun

Overall score: 9,2/10

The Crazed Buttstaber: 9/10 - ''I love you Sasha''

Dave: 10/10- "I like. To shoot. This gun. Is all you need to know."

logitin: 10/10- "it's so good i have a citizins pain.i can't spell"

FGTH 10/10- ''sasha''

Agent Walther: 8/10- ''Well, stock is stock. Nothing special''

Dr. Moron: 9/10- ''Sasha is best for killing tiny cowards,but sometimes Heavy wishes for another way to kill those cowards.''

Landeyx : 10/10- ''Stock is best but loud''

Cpt. Haxray: 8/10- ''its the stock, its just well rounded''

Panic Attack

Overall score: 3.4/10

The Crazed Buttstaber: 2/10- '' We have gone over this...''

Dave: ?/10- "Eeeh... Its been buffed but I haven't used this.."

FGTH: 1.5/10- ''Cowardly name''

LOGITIN: 1.8/10- ''don't use''

Agent Walther: 2,5/10- "Kind of usable. Kind of."

doctahzomboss: 0/10- ''x10 servers 100/10''

Dr. Moron: 5/10- ''It is still bad but it got kinda better.''

Canada: 10/10- I love the Panic Attack. Got it in a trade before Gun Mettle because it was a new item. After a while,I was like "Why the Hell'd I get this peice of shi~ Wait,it starts with no ammo,then I reload it?" It's unique. It's for those who want to ambush a guy,but they take too long to actually seize the momen and they get away. Once it loads up to 4,you have to get out there and shoot or else they'll know where you are,and die. I found out that other people got thier reviews here,so I published mine,too.

The OGREseer: 6.5/10- ''The Panic Attack isn't a terrible weapon. Great for ambushing.(Personally best for Pyro.)''

Landeyx: 3/10- ''I panick when i see this weapon in my hands''

Cpt. Haxray: 2/10- ''Even worse than on other classes since you got so many other better options.''

Dalokas Bar

Couldnt find a good Dalokas bar pic.
Overall score: 4.3/10

The Crazed Buttstaber: 4/10- '' It got a nice buff, it can finnaly be thrown and now its rechargable... Valve, back to the drawing board, we already have a sandwich.''

Dave: 3/10- "I can't see myself using this."

FGTH: 3/10- ''dont bring chocolate to a battlefield I AM NOT WILLY WONKA!''

LOGITIN: 4.7/10- ''it is good but only use it when theres no medic''

Agent Walther: 6.3/10- "Max hp boost is really good for pubs since medics are the rarest kind of people there"

Dr. Moron: 6.5/10 - ''Heavy is already fat,don't make his situation worse''

Landeyx: 0/10- ''NO heavy has got enough hp''

Cpt. Haxray: 7/10- ''While its main effect on yourself of overhealing is almost completely worthless 9 times out of 10, the fact it recharges faster than the normal sandvich does give it a niche role in providing more heaht to your teammates. Normal sandvich is usally better though.''

Buffalo Steak Sandvich

Overall score: 4,7/10

The Crazed Buttstaber: 7/10- ''I am big warrior, you know?''

Dave: 9/10- "Wear the KGB and you will be unstoppable Pootis train."

FGTH 4.5/10- ''.................''

LOGITIN:1/10-"I HATE THIS TO BITS!!!"

Agent Walther: 6/10- "Speed and dmg boost are gud. KGB makes it better. But... Not that gud."

Landeyx: 0/10- ''Heavy bears are extincted''

Cpt. Haxray: 6/10- ''A purely weaker sandvich, the only reason you would ever pick this over the normal one is for going for a melee gimmick. Still keeps most of the utlity of the normal sandvich, however.''

Shotgun

Overall score: 6/10

The Crazed Buttstaber: 4/10 - ''I give it 4/10 not because its bad but because we have so many other better options.''

Dave: 6/10 - "Scout + Obesity + Scattergun = Heavy with Shotgun"

FGTH 6/10- ''scattergun srsly dude dave scattergun is to shotguns glued together''

LOGITIN:6/10-"meh"

Agent Walther: 4/10- "Heavy's stock shotty. Equal to scout's scattergun, but unlike scout, the giant pootis hero has a lot of better options"

Dr. Moron: 7/10- ''Good for trying to imitate Scout but when I tried to eat it it broke my teeth.''

Landeyx: 7/10- ''Get em as a fat scout''

Cpt. Haxray: 8/10- ''its stock, nothing super good or super bad here.''

Family Bussiness

Overall Score: 7,4/10

The Crazed Buttstaber: 5/10- ''Just sligthly better than a normal shotgun... I think... It has never been very clear.''

Dave: 5/10- "This buff is nearly non-existant."

FGTH 7.5/10- ''direct upgrade to stock i still dont like shotties''

LOGITIN: 8/10- "it a good gun...POOTIS"

Agent Walther: 10/10- "Almost direct upgrade in terms of dps from stock. Also, a bigger clip and a cool look makes it almost perfect for offence and sniper annoying"

Dr. Moron: 8/10- ''Shotgun:for the burst damage This:for the sustained damage''

Laneyx: 8/10- ''Lets go for it guys!''

Cpt. Haxray: 8/10- ''formerly inferior to stock, now is a decent sidegrade to stock.''

Sandvich

Overall score: 8,8/10

The Crazed Buttstaber: 10/10- ''Was there really any doubt?''

Dave: 6/10- "For all your hunger needs, Heavy couldn't get a damned Burger or something. Naah, this just temporarily reduces his Obesity. Maybe, JUST MAYBE, if he had something from Burger King or McDonalds, he'd actually get 2x the HP he usually has and perhaps more damage by sitting his fat ass upon a stupid Scout. But nah. We get Bread."

logitin: 9/10- "...SANDVICH IS BEST..."

FGTH 10/10- ''GOTTA PUT THE AVERAGE UP''

Agent Walther: 6.5/10- "It's good if you have a medic stick his medigun up your butt. But taunting to heal yourself can get you killed easily"

Dr. Moron:9/10- ''War in no place for a picnic...EXCEPT HERE!''

Jonh the Enginner: 10/10- ''The Sandvich is always good when your Medic dies. And Heavy always says a funny quote after it. Its a win win.''

Laneyx: 10/10- ''I don't need you to tell why.''

Cpt. Haxray: 9/10- ''You will generally be using this over any other secondary, due to the sheer utility of it. Can be used to heal yourself, heal your teammates, put your medkit out, turn small heath kits into bigger ones for your teammates....''

There are no bad meele weapons, only bad uses to them.

Eviction Notice

Overall score: 5/10

The Crazed Buttstaber: 5/10- ''Hit as fast as a Scout, run as fast as a scout and be as dangerous as a scout, today for only 12 dolars at your local Mann Co. (Disclaimer: speed may not match the actual one)

FGTH 3/10- ''gg''

LOGITIN:1.1/10-"f#@$ this melee"

Dr. Moron: 5/10- ''Good for punching fast but sadly it feels like I am punching with hard pillows.''

Agent Walther: 10/10- "Annoys people like hell, crits like hell, makes you fast and hard to catch in a melee fight"

Cpt. Haxray: 6/10- ''Simply inferior fists for the most part, on a class where melee by itself isn't very important, theres not much point to this weapon.''

Fists

Overall score: 5.3/10

The Crazed Buttstaber: 4/10- ''There are many other better options for punching the enemy face in.''

FGTH 1.5/10- ''fists or boxing gloves hmmmm''

LOGITIN:5.1/10-"yea i love this but i know why its bad at times"

Dr. Moron: 3/10- ''Why whould I punch someone with my bare hands to death when I can beat someone with a pan to death?''

Agent Walther: 4/10- "Taunt kill is gud. But nothing more."

Laneyx: 8/10- ''Not the best,but still good.''

Sir. ButterShoes: 8/10- ''No downsides. Simple.''

Cpt. Haxray: 8/10- ''heavy rarely fights in melee, so keep that in mind.''

Warrior Spirit

Overall Score: 5.4/10

The Crazed Buttstaber: 5/10- ''This weapon will probably get you killed more times than you killling them.''

LOGITIN:6.3/10-"HELL YEA"

Dave: 5/10- "Might as well just write something dumb here. Penis."

Dr. Moron: 5/10- ''Sadly it kills me more than anyone else.''

Agent Walther: 3/10- "Not worth the -20 hp"

The OGREseer: 8/10- ''Crits cause assloads of damage that is comparable to a Crocket. Used best with Buffalo Steak Sammich and the Bear Nessesities to go full on Pootis Bear.(Personal favorite sub-class)''

Laneyx: 6/10- ''Lets go BEAR HOOVY''

Fists of Steel

Overall score: 6,7/10

The Crazed Buttstaber: 4/10- '' When you do find a bad situation where you need this fists, you will probably be dead before you take them out.''

FGTH 7.5/10- ''you know comp the guys who spam lennies they use them''

LOGITIN: 8.9/10- ''YEAAAAA BOYYYYYY''

Dave: 6/10- "This isn't really a weapon intended for use... Ahem... Sentries..."

Dr. Moron: 6.7/10- ''It offers a nice resistance bonus but sadly if someone whacks you with something it will most likely kill you"

Agent Walther: 8/10- "Snipers can't do ♥♥♥♥ with it"

Laneyx: 4/10- ''not good enough your dead before you can say sandvich''

Cpt. Haxray: 9/10- ''One of the most used weapons in comp, and simply one of heavy's best melees, period. The damage reduction when you have them out is insane, allowing heavy to have a chance to get around sniper zones, as well as helping him block rockets and other projectiles going for his medic way easier.''

Gloves of Running Urgently (GRU)

Overall Score: 7/10

The Crazed Buttstaber: 7/10- ''It looks like painting some flames on some normal boxing gloves gave you super powers...''

LOGITIN:7/10-"u become a scoot"

Dave: 6/10- "Cures Obesity."

Dr. Moron: 9/10:Tired of being fa-I mean big-boned and slow?Is your Medic begging you to run faster?Does Scout always make fun of your short legs and steals your sandvich?Well if the answer to atleast 2 questions is "Yes" in russian we have the right thing for you.We present you the GRU!The flames painted on these most likely magic gloves will motivate you to run faster*!Also it comes in "Festive" and "Mutant Bread" variants. *at the cost of weakening exhaustion and softer gloves.

Agent Walther: 6/10- "Go faster, die faster"

Laneyx: 6/10- ''GOTTA BE FAST but in two bodyshots your dead''

Cpt. Haxray: 8/10- ''Banned in competitve, this weapon is generally absolete garbage for most cases. However, it REALLY shines on control point maps, where you can get to the center point at the same speed as other classes, which is a bigger deal than you think in Competitive. Otherwise, its absolete garbage.''

Holiday Punch

Overall score: 8.3/10

The Crazed Buttstaber: 10/10- '' I'll take any direct upgrade any day.''

LOGITIN:10/10- "can i say something yes its good

Dave: 0/10- "♥♥♥♥ you."

Dr. Moron: 10/10- ''It's like your fists except that your deadly uppercuts will be harmless and stunningly amusing.''

Agent Walther: 10/10- "Best overhealed enemy disabler ever"

Landeyx: 10/10- ''HAHAHAHAHAHAHA PAW DED :3''

Killing Gloves of Boxing (KBG)

Overall score: 8,4/10

The Crazed Buttstaber: 8/10 - '' When you get a kill and the entire enemy team is next to you... RAMPAGE TIME. ''

Dave: 9/10- "Use the Steak ONLY with this."

LOGITIN:8.9/10- "yay for KGB"

Dr. Moron: 7.5/10- ''SUCKER PUNCH!''

Agent Walther: 10/10- "Crits for tommy and shotty. Pretty good if you manage to random crit a spy with it AND to find someone to use the crits on"

Landeyx: 7/10- ''Uppercut CRITS MINIGUN and everybody dies.''

Apoco Fists

(check the comments if you want to know why this is here)
Overall score: 9.7/10

The Crazed Buttstaber: 10/10- ''Crits explode... nuff said''

Lord Gaben's Pillow of Death: 9/10- ''not perfect, but still good.''

Dr. Moron: 10/10- ''A melee kill was never this satisfying.(Tip:Your steak mini-crits count as crits)''

Landeyx: 10/10- ''Hail Lord GabeN''

logitin[now juicey]:10/10- "SUCH KILL MUCH SWAG"

So, again with the end of the guide... School starting here so will be harder to put out guides but I will do my best... And next one is... *Looks at old piece of paper* ENGY. While we wait to gather up all that hate for the mini sentry in one place you could check out the other guides. Just dont forget to comment your opinion of the weapons and give them ratings so YOU TOO can apear in the guide.

THE ARCHIVE
http://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=587194535

Check out The cool front page guide of Landeyx and me:
http://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=517570005

http://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=456854260

http://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=448227690

http://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=443273227

http://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=438846356

Also do check out a side project of mine while I was working on this guide where I try to give a price to every new skin in ref / Keys... It went way to much effort into it for you not to see it :3

http://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=520230459

SAVE THE MELON!

http://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=534962793

Medic guide has arrived!
http://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=565005884