Counter-Strike 2

Counter-Strike 2

1,712 ratings
Counter-Strike: For Kid's instant rice tutorial
By Steorras
Today I'm going to teach you the secret enigmatic tricks that have eluded CS:n00bs for years.
   
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NEW GUIDE

NEW guide for PUBG,

PubG Guide
Introduction



Snap on your meme glasses and get ready to party kiddies
This guide isn't afraid of no man woman or child with an L337 four hundred and twenty intervention non-scoped in rifle. I apologize if the guide becomes too lewd for you at somepoint.
The Basic Memes

The basic points to playing


Everyone and their reddit stalker knows that CS:NO is a clean ripoff of Dota 2 so if you are going to tread these waters bring along some friends. It's best to get cancer as a group than to go it alone.

Once the females are aquired, create a sexy may may group I.E.: L3wD_Qt3.14_g4m3rz and setup a pretty MLG clan tag. My favorite one to use is FaZe, but who knows maybe OpTiC is more your shade of autism.

After you have checked your privileges you can finally group up with your gay ♥♥♥♥ lovers for better or for worse. When you get everyone in a lobby call up mom and have her bring you a camera before starting the comp search.

Recommended maps:
  • Dust II
  • Any map from Operation Pheonix
  • Train

Any other map should never be searched for because they give you the downs just by playing on them like an autist.
Professional Weapon buy choices
Literally Hitler-kun weapons are the best kind of weapons

Buying weapons in CS:Blows is a key part of the game, so sometimes it is better to spend the money on c@$h m0n3y marijuana rather than buy a gun every round.

nobody even cares about this garbo waste of time weapon that seemingly costs $500 in real life currency like bit coin or some garbo. The AWP is for ebola users only, and thats how it should stay although it is unfortunate that everybody in this game buys it and expects to make sick frag videos while on Rust II.


If you or a loved one has been diagnosed with severe autism that was caused by this weapon, consult a doctor about lethal injections please for the love of god.

My pro weapons tip is to buy only zues x27's and the 1337 intervention non-scoped rifle for maximum anti-ebola destruction.

more coming soon...
The Ranking System

This is one of the reasons people hate and love this game so much

Counter-Strike:Oust Yourself's competitive ranking system is based on the chess ELO ranked bracket, which is pretty easy to follow. MVP's and rounds won (not games won) count towards your ELO rank. A players recorded ELO rank starts at 1 and goes to 18 (global elite) and varies based on the rounds won compared to your loss of rounds. Get more MVP's and you get matched with higher ELO players.
Progressive Playstyle

Smoke Weed Everyday

Step 1 of playing progressively is to equip your
meme tunes.









still a work in progress
DISCLAIMER: This is not a serious guide
So don't take anything said here to heart unless you deem it extremely necessary
194 Comments
ЧУПАПИ КАКТУС 30 Oct, 2023 @ 11:38am 
bro why i cant add ur guide in fovourite leadership showcase steam?
rytuii. 15 Aug, 2021 @ 1:04am 
ded
mukkelis 26 Aug, 2018 @ 11:39am 
ENG: Choose the one that's on the list and write in my profile, I will answer the same!
GER: Such dir eine Sache aus der Liste aus und schreib es unter mein Profil und ich mache es auch bei dir!
PL: Wybierz jeden z komentarzy ponizej i zamieść w moim profilu, odwdzięcze się tym samym !
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Fate world 3 Jul, 2018 @ 5:36am 
OK
Mendel 1 Sep, 2017 @ 3:59pm 
=)
Crisis 12 Aug, 2017 @ 5:52am 
im a bakanekochangirl
Crisis 12 Aug, 2017 @ 5:52am 
I will do same
Crisis 12 Aug, 2017 @ 5:52am 
HEY MY ANIME FRIENDS <3333333333




Commend me on my profile
Coop 7 Jun, 2017 @ 10:30pm 
i want to fucking kill myself
back3nd 27 Apr, 2017 @ 7:11am 
+rep very gud guide i got lem