Daddy Keegs

-rep dropped da glizzy

I sexually identify as a single, Pringle, ready to mingle. Ever since I was a potato I dreamed of being thin sliced, covered in disgusting oil then heated in a medium oven until reaching climax at the micro second of golden-browness. People bully me, and say things like "what the ♥♥♥♥, you aren't a Pringle", but I know deep down they are just jealous of my inner beauty. I have already started hiding in cylinders all day, and now im improving my crunchiness by regularly burning my sides on the stove. I want you guys to respect my natural ability to instantly satisfy low salt carb cravings, and if you don't you are oppressing me, and you should check your diabetes type. Thank you for being so understanding.

Hey, you. You're finally awake. You were trying to cross the border,
right? Walked right into that Imperial ambush, same as us, and that
thief over there. Damn you Stormcloaks. Skyrim was fine until you came along. Empire was
nice and lazy. If they hadn't been looking for you, I could've stolen
that horse and been half way to Hammerfell. You there. You and me we
shouldn't be here. It's these Stormcloaks the Empire wants. We're all brothers and sisters in binds now, thief. Imperial Soldier: Shut up back there! And what's wrong with him? Watch your tongue! You're speaking to Ulfric Stormcloak, the true High
King. Ulfric? The Jarl of Windhelm? You're the leader of the rebellion. But if
they captured you... Oh gods, where are they taking us? I don't know where we're going, but Sovngarde awaits. No, this can't be happening. This isn't happening.

+rep

+rep